Putting God in Charge, Leaving all Worry and doubt Behind

Lets face it…we all worry, we all doubt things, we like being in charge….

This topic sits very deep within who I am…I have always been a worry wart. I tend to over analyze anything and everything in my life. I always complicate the most simple subject and complicate the most simple response. I know this issue resides with many people out there.

How many of you worry about everything all at once, all the time…Welcome to the club.

I have been out on my own since the age of 16, I have been paying the bills and rent before I was old enough to legally get into a R-rated movie. So at a really young age I have been forced to always be on guard. To always be ready for the worst, to always be ready to pay the bills. I know the idea of independence for most of you youngins sounds amazing. But it isn’t as appealing as it sounds. With great freedom comes great responsibilities. The once taken for granted things such as a home cooked meal, clean laundry, clean bed sheets, becomes a mandatory chore. Oh and not to mention dishes (sigh)…Oh how I hate dishes, the day I installed a dish washer was the day I realized that the man behind this creation (dishwasher) was the smartest person alive! I was tempted to track him down and shake his hand because i was so grateful.

Also, When you are required to actually pay for electricity you will shortly realize, why your mom used to scream at you for turning on all the lights of the house. Why she would ground you for leaving the lights and TV on when you left the house. Electricity isn’t cheap, rent isn’t cheap. Nothing is free, everything cost money…well you get the picture. Oh and on top of that you make minimum wage so it takes you 500 hours to pay for one months rent ….haha. So you see although it might be fun to live independently it has its disadvantages. When I first started off I dealt with the daily stresses of; will I make rent this month? Will I have enough for all my expenses…and still have enough for that date? Often times I would prioritize so poorly that I wouldn’t have enough money for rent. Which of course made me crawl to my parents with my tail between my legs and ask to borrow money. But this was just a small part of independent life.

In my particular case, I was a young striving individual that decided to open up a business at a very young age. I decided making money was more important than High school, so I dropped out. I opened up a construction business at roughly the age of 16, and was hiring employees just a year later.

The stress involved in running a business was not something that was taught in my text books. No one warned me about how difficult it would be to deal with employees, how difficult it would be to deal with clients. Or how disciplining yourself to wake up on time for work when you don’t have a boss, would be the greatest challenge.

This lifestyle at a young age threw me into turmoil. The life of an average 40 year old was something I had already adopted at the age of 17 or so. The most difficult thing about this was I could never leave work at work, but would carry the stresses of work with me everywhere I went. I started to have difficulties sleeping, I started to eat poorly, I started to get stomach issues (acid reflux). This lifestyle was more than I could handle.

You would think that I would eventually give in, but no…I had too much pride. I would never let myself fail. I could never go crawling back to my parents because after all “I am a young successful entrepreneur now,” right?

At this stage in my life, I was Godless. I mean, I went to church, I would attend all the Russian churches, however, it was mostly to socialize. I didn’t see the need for God at this point in my life. I had everything I wanted; I was young, had my own place, had a girlfriend, had money, had freedom…what else could a young individual ask for? Well, who knew that God had a different plan for me? Who knew that God didn’t approve of my life choices…

Just a few short years later I had met one individual that stopped me in my tracks. A person so near and dear to my heart that I actually was inspired to leave everything behind and follow Jesus. However, this was the beginning to the shaky road ahead of me. I thought that life would be just as perfect as it always had been. I thought, well if I apply all my efforts as I always do I could attain anything (I had been so successful in the past, right?)

I wasn’t aware that what I had envisioned my life to be, might not be part of Gods plans….I always thought that this life was more based on our own will and life choices….oh boy was I wrong. I shortly learned that not everything that we desire in this world is indeed in Gods plan for us. Sometimes we are consumed with what we are striving for…it starts to alter how we approach life.

Well, not to beat around the bush, I met a girl, lets be real here. I met a girl and fell madly in love with her. I started to build my relationship with her, but I didn’t realize that my relationship with her seemed to be more important than the actual relationship that I had with Jesus. I started to focus on her more than God himself. This infatuation was short lived, because as we got closer the relationship with God got weaker. I started to pray very selfishly, I tried to give God ultimatums. I would plead God for things between me and this individual to work out, but although all the signs were there I chose to ignore them…I put a blind eye to the truth and strictly started to listen to my emotions…

How many people can relate to that.. How many people would chose a person they love over Jesus, well you say you won’t but when you are presented with the decision you might act differently. Many of us are in relations now that we shouldn’t be in. Relationships that instead of bringing us closer to God, they separate us from God. Relationships that cause us to sin.

All these struggles I encountered were just stepping stones God had placed in my life to build me up. He allowed worry to enter my life that way I break down and realize that I am not strong enough to handle myself. That I am created to be dependent on Christ.

What does God say about our future? What does God say about our worrisome nature?

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. (Jerimiah 29:11)

I honestly admire Jeremiah, He was considered to be one of the loneliest individuals of the Bible. At a very young age (17)he became a prophet and God spoke through him. Can you imagine…Seems like the most valuable thing in life taken away from you…could you do it? Could you entrust God so much that you would become celibate? Oh and imagine this, the people you are preaching to don’t listen to you whatsoever…He is known as “the weeping prophet,” because he cried tears of sadness, not only because he knew what was about to happen, but because no matter how hard he tried, the people would not listen. Furthermore, he found no human comfort. God had forbidden him to marry or have children, and his friends had turned their backs on him. So, along with the burden of the knowledge of impending judgment, he also must have felt very lonely. God knew that this was the best course for Jeremiah, because He went on to tell him how horrible conditions would be in a short time, with babies, children, and adults dying “grievous” deaths, their bodies unable to even be buried, and their flesh devoured by the birds.

So if anyone could have doubted God it would’ve been Jeremiah. He had nothing in life….He had no friends, people didn’t change or repent from his ministry. He probably felt useless. But he Chose to believe in God no matter what.

In fact, his story was written well before he was born, just like mine and yours.

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations.” (Jeremiah 1:5)

How are we to focus on whats important. How do we remove worry from our lives? It’s actually a sin to worry do you know that? Because you are doubting Gods ability to provide for you…imagine if you always doubted your spouses ability to provide even though they always have done so perfectly?…How would they respond? When you doubt God you elevate yourself above Gods ability. God doesn’t need our help with taking care of his creation. He knows what he has created.. He knows what every person needs in his life. He doesn’t need to be told what we think we need in our life. I wanted to marry this certain individual and God simply showed me that I wasn’t going to tell him what my destiny would be, when he clearly knew better….

 “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?  Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life” (Matt 6:25-27)

This verse reminds me who is in control, this verse makes me realize that we are not independent like I thought I was. We will always be in our fathers house. We will never have to do our own spiritual laundry, or spiritual dishes, Because God will always provide. I wanted to thank the individual that created the dishwasher, but how many people have the desire to thank God for the food on their table?

We forget that God made a promise to provide, If most earthly fathers will take care of their kids because they belong to them, they are of them, what makes people think that an all loving father like God will not.

Let go of all your worries. Let go of all your doubt….Let God be in charge, let God take care of all your spiritual baggage. You don’t have to carry that heavy burden of doubt, or that depressing anxiety of worry.